Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy Birthday

Well, today would have been hubby's 62nd birthday
Yep ~ He spoiled his momma's New Year's Eve Party
But, what a blessing to receive!!

He is spending his 2nd birthday in heaven this year
And in honor of him
Son #2 and I
Have spent the day
Washing walls, patching holes, cleaning closets
And prepping to paint tomorrow

Hubby would be proud of what a super team we are making
We have laughed, played, shopped and cleaned our hearts out
Soon I will be able to share some
Before and After photos
But for today
Here's a photo of my beloved and I
Taken at Tonto Bridge 2 years ago
Oh, and that is Sam :)

Happy New Year Everybody
And Happy Birthday in Heaven Honey!!

Thursday, December 29, 2011


The mess, stuff and things of
Have been taken down and packed away
Now behind closed cabinet doors
Not to see the light of day for another 11 months

I pushed myself this year
Far beyond what I 'felt' ready for
To decorate and enjoy this most precious of Holidays
Not for myself but for the memory of him
And though the stuff has been put away

The "Christ" of Christmas
Will be kept well within my grasp
Just as this memory of my beloved
Was close throughout the Christmas season

The year now behind me
I don't know where it went
But to honor what we had
I lift up my eyes and look to heaven

My steps may be slow and shaky at first
I may seem lost or confused
Yet I am taking the Lead
From a God I cannot see
And trusting He knows
What is best for me

I'm taking off the Black
Putting away the veil
Where I go from this point forward
God will soon Reveal

Considering Life,

Saturday, December 24, 2011

But I'm Thankful

Where did the year go?
It seems like only yesterday
I was looking into your eyes
But is has been a year

I didn't know when we talked that day
That it would be our last conversation

I didn't know when I got your heater
That your body was already shutting down

I didn't know when I prepared your lunch
That it would be your last meal

I didn't know when I brought out your oxygen
That your breathing would become so much easier

I didn't know as I prepared your blankets and pillows on the couch
That it would soon become your death bed

I didn't know when I looked into your eyes,
kissed you good night and told you I Love You
That it would be that last time

I didn't know I would never hear your voice again
Or see your eyes, or watch you smile

I didn't know the plan God had for our Christmas Eve morning

I didn't know that I would wake to find your in the arms of Jesus

I didn't know the year that was ahead 

I didn't know how much I would miss you

I didn't know how deeply the pain would affect my life

I didn't know anything then that I know now

But I'm thankful

Thankful that:

You were comfortable 

You were at peace

Your tummy was full

Your bed was prepared

Jesus was waiting and calling your name

I looked into the deep of your eyes

I kissed you good night

I told you I loved you as you did me

For today I can sit and remember you with no regrets

Loving the Great of our 31 years together

And knowing that you are my future

You wait with Jesus until the day He calls my name

We will be reunited again

So many words fill my heart

I Will Always Love You

Are the ones that stick

I am thankful as well

For the friends I have met along this path

The ones who have walked with me for part of it

And those headed in the opposite direction

Each one has played a part in my story

Each one a portion of my healing

And now I turn the page

To a new chapter

I already know the ending

But am looking forward to the details

That lie within the rest of the journey

You are resting in His arms my love

And I will continue on 

Until that great day when we All will Rejoice in Him

Thursday, December 22, 2011

December Daily 22

I was blessed to photograph
My K~Bug
While she made
Apple Cinnamon Muffins
In my kitchen

They were delicious!!!

If I were to share my heart tonight
Besides being grateful for a multitude of things

It would tell you how much it misses my Mark
Just 2 days before the 1st anniversary
Of his HomeGoing

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

December Daily 21

It's been suggested that sharing my heart
Is not a good thing to do on my blog

So instead I will share my
Christmasy Jewelry for today
 This little bracelet is fun
And a bit jingly
I'm not sure if you can see the bracelet above
It is an Italian Charm bracelet that a friend gave me
On the day my son donated a kidney to my husband
All of the charms are Hubby related
Mostly from events we attended together
Since I am a miniature nativity collector
He bought me the tiny nativity charm
you can just barely make out in the center
I where it every day
Having my son home again is a joy
But today was a Super Joy
He cooked up some
Homemade turkey vegetable soup
Which was piping hot and ready to eat
When I walked in the door after work at 7:20 PM

Love you all :)

Oh, and BTW
Since this IS my blog
My heart is not doing so great tonight!!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

December Daily 20

My Christmasy Jewelry
For today was this Angel
Not so much to remind me of Christmas
But to remind me of where my Peace comes from
 After nearly losing my boy
You can see that even the doggies
Are Happy to have him home
No amount of 'Christmasy' stuff
Could ever fill this momma's heart
With the Joy and Gratefulness
She feels today :)

Monday, December 19, 2011

December Daily 18 & 19

Continuning with my efforts
To get into and stay in the Christmas Spirit
I dawned this cute little pair
Of Rudoloph Earrings

But actually today my spirit was struggling a bit
When I was not able to bring my son home
From his now 5th day at the hospital

So I summond the Lord
And was reminded about what the Christmas Spirit is anyway

Not Rudolph, snowmen or Christmas trees
Not presents, wrappings or shopping

But about the Peace within my heart
Knowing that even in these difficult days
God is with us
Helping us to make choices that will bless
And protect my son's life
God is evident in the progress he has made

A Baby King
A Perfect Life
A Pure Gift


A Risen Savior
A Life Eternal
A Peace Unmatched

Thank you Lord
Where would we be
In the Dark Times
Without the Truth of the Christmas Story

Saturday, December 17, 2011

December Daily 17

Eight years ago today
I was waiting at a hospital while my oldest son
Donated a kidney to my husband
He added 7 years and 7 days to his dad's life
Now he visits me
With his beautiful wife
2 preciously delightful daughters
While they wait for daughter #3 to be born
Andrew You are a Gift
You are the most giving young man I have ever met
I love you so much

Today I visited a hospital
To spend an hour with son #2
His grieving process got the best of him
He's needed some rest time
Matthew you are Loved
And have blessed my heart for 26 years
I am so Proud of You

When I arrived home after my hospital visit
There was a beautful gift awaiting my arrival

What a sweet and special surprise
From someone who has loved me through
My most Ugly moments this past year

Thank you for the Christmasy Goodies
They will be used and displayed with JOY

Thank YOU for your Prayers
I have Felt Them All

Friday, December 16, 2011

December Daily 15 & 16

No photos to share today
December Daily 15 ended with an emergency department visit
A trip to another hospital which turned into
December Daily 16

I am exhausted
But heading out very soon
For a visit with Son # 2

The 10 most difficult days of this year are ahead of us
The circumstances which surround the past 24 hours
Are in fact rocking this momma to her core
I didn't really believe that things could get worse

All I am able to do is bow my body in prayer
Seek guidance from my Creator
And Believe that HE is Stronger than anything we face

I will be back tomorrow with
December Daily 17
And some sort of Happy Photos

Blessings to you all

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

December Daily 14

Today was a beautiful day
Filled with moments of sunshine and of course more clouds
But no rain so I did get out in the garage
And begin to tackle THIS:

 Over the past couple of years
So many items have just been thrown there on Mark's work bench
It drives me nuts so I have been wanting to get out there and clean
I was able to do some today
But have such a LONG way to go
Son #1 stopped by this afternoon and had a panic attack
Thinking that I was going to toss all of his dad's 'treasures'
Lots Will be tossed
But My Goodness...there is enough for Many Garages:)

Found this cute guy out there
Need to find a cute place for him to rest up
Before Christmas Eve

 I have attempted to keep my posts free of emotions or feelings
The past week due to some 'comments'
Yet I must share that
Today I am reminded that there are only
10 days left until the 1 year anniversary of my hubby's passing

I am doing well, keeping busy and focused
But honestly friends
I cannot believe it has been a year since I last kissed him goodnight,
Held his hand or told him I Love You
My heart is sad tonight
But tomorow is a new day
And tonight I have a date

Ms Clairol

Hope you are enjoying your Christmas Season
Be back tomorrow with Daily 15
Where does the time go???

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

December Daily 13

Living in Sunny Arizona
Allows for plans to be made
And seldom changed due to weather
Yet, most all of the plans I had
For my very fist week long
StayCation have been washed out
Due to all of the rain we have received over the past few days

It is much needed in AZ
And I am enjoying the benefits of it
Just look at my beautiful green lawn
But I sure have not accomplished 1 thing on my 'list'

Instead of painting and garage updating
I have been doing a little house cleaning
And a small amount of Christmas decorating
Today I put up a small Santa Boot Christmas Tree
In my bathroom
Which adds a bit of joy
For those early mornings

And since the rain has kept me inside
I am actually doing a little cooking
Tonights menu includes this
Hopefully Yummy Roast
With Veggies and Fresh Garlic Bread

See you tomorrow
With 'hopefully' some Good news
Regarding Projects Completed

Monday, December 12, 2011

December Daily 12

Today has been a
Cold, Wet, Dark and Dreary Day

It was much too cold and wet to
Begin the main project I am
Hoping to accomplish this week

So, I spent most of the day
Cleaning and recovering areas of my office
Which have been hidden by months
Of mail and what not

Matthew put up his
Fiber Optic Tree

Although it is only 5 o'clock
I have my nice and warm
Christmasy Jammies on
Getting ready to have a little soup for dinner
And then a quiet night of
Monday Night Football

And while watching the game
Since I love to Multi-task
I will be going through a years worth of photos
To decide which ones I want to send to Mark's Momma

Have a great night
See you tomorrow :)

Sunday, December 11, 2011

December Daily 11

The days are flying by
My list is getting longer
But at least I accomplished 1 thing today

I felt unable this year
To pull out our family Christmas Tree
So I purchased this little 4' one instead

It's WAY smaller than I thought it would be
Yet bring just enough joy and light
To make me smile
 And with a new puppy around The Place
I think this is the Best choice
For a tree this year


As for my Christmasy Jewelry today
I chose this bracelet
It's not easy to see
But it is little angels
Blowing trumpets
It may not be actual Christmas Jewelry
But it is Christmasy to me all the same

Well, tomorrow is my real first vacation day
And my list is Full
So, I'm off for the night
Need to get my beauty rest you know *wink~wink*

Saturday, December 10, 2011

December Daily 10

This first day of my 'staycation' has just flown by
I'm most excited about the fact that
I spent most of it with my sister

We began our day with some
Early morning Garage Sales
Where I found this Christmasy Jewelry for .50

After we went to the ol' WallyWorld
Where my sister bought me this Christmasy Pin
I think I'll be wearing this one to church in the morning

We took a short break and each went home
Then we met at my house and ventured out
For a lunch and a few stops at
Kohl's, JoAnn's, and Party City


I am home relaxing with one of my pair
Of Christmasy Socks
As you can probably tell by now
Even in the worst of seasons


Catch Ya Tomorrow :)

Friday, December 9, 2011

December Daily 9

 Look what my Secret Santa brought me this week
I'm afraid to tell 'her' I need to stay away from that stuff
I've lost 15 pounds and I don't want to put it back on
I will do my best to limit myself to 1 piece per day
'Have Mercy'
 Look only at the cute snowy Christmas Tree earring
And not that chipmunk cheek :)
This is another pair that my friend gave me on Monday
I am officially on StayCation
I have not taken a week off work in several years
(minus when Mark passed last year)
This will be my first real
Week Long StayCation
I have SOSOSO many projects planned
And can't wait to share before and after photos with you
After the first of the Year

So, now I will go put on some comfy close
And spend time with my Grandgirls
While their mommy and daddy
Go out and enjoy an Anniversary dinner

See you tomorrow!!!

Thursday, December 8, 2011

December Daily 8

Now who could not smile
When looking at that precious face

I'll be back tomorrow

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

December Daily 7

Happy Mail arrived today
 I finally have a cover for my iphone4
 And of course, what else
It is Red and Black
My favorite combo
 I suppose after some disappointments in the past few days
I really had to 'dig' to find some 'JOYS' today
Above is a photo of my Empty Laundry Basket
Now THAT can make a girlie smile ;)
My Christmasy Jewel of the Day
This festive, quirky little smiling
Christmas Tree
Yes, again I've had it for many years
But it was fun to wear it today

Where did God show you some Joy today,

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

December Daily 6

With each passing day
Comes a more intense and deeper pain
The empty black chair
Beckons my comfort
Yet there is no one to comfort my brokenness

Oh, to be held and loved
My soul can only recall
The moments from days gone by
Thankful for each one of them
Longing for their presence
Only to be awakened to their silence

Attempting to find Joy in each new day
I dawned one of my prize pieces of Christmas jewelry
I have collected miniatrue nativities
For Many years

Thankful for the times he touched it
While it embraced my wrist

Son #2 is not feeling well tonight
So Chicken soup and bread to the rescue
My heart is not feeling so well either

So I will slip into my comfy Christmas Jammies
And cuddle up alone
In my empty black chair
Longing for his presence
Thankful for his memory

Where are you finding your Joy today,

Monday, December 5, 2011

December Daily 5

Today was Tough
A new and dear friend
Who has been affected by widowhood
At a young age
Wanted to do something special
To honor her husband this Christmas Season
She put out a request for special ornaments
So she could create a 'Chris' Tree

Her husband had a few of the same interests
As my husband did
I thought, prayed and contemplated
What type of ornament I would like to send her
As a remembrance of both of our guys

Today, I mailed the ornament of choice:
 Above, in the Christmas Ornament Frame
Is the Very Last Fly my husband tied before his passing
He would spend hours tying flies when he was younger
But the last several years he almost never touched the supplies
One evening he decided to give it a try
And above is the final outcome 
His Final One
May it Hang Proudly on Leah's 'Chris' Tree
 When I arrived at work today
I found the above card and package on my desk
One of my co-workers has been a young widow for many years
She understands the fear of facing this Christmas season
The card (adorable)
Written inside ~ Well let's just say ~ tears
Her heart truly knows my heart
She must have read my blog
Because she knew my goal of wearing
A piece of Christmas jewelry every day
Inside ~ 3 Darling pair of Christmas earrings
Here is my Christmas jewelry for today
One of the pair I received from my co-worker
They were ringing all day
And helped keep me grounded
With my heart focused on what Christmas is all about

And now,
I must go wrapped my Secret Santa gifts
To take to work tomorrow

I Pray you are finding Joy even in the tough things,

Sunday, December 4, 2011

December Daily 4

I wish I could say that
I am in a Super Perky Christmasy Mood
""Not So Much""

For some reason known only to God
I'm feeling rather down and out today
I did get to spend some time
With my granddaughters
And that always makes me happy
 K~Bel and K~Bug
 K~Bug just before daddy took off the training wheels
K~Bel in her Santa shirt

Sorry, No Christmas Jewelry today

We did go back out to the stables today
Only to have Matthew get bucked off again
He is resting in the next room
He Loves to Ride
But this Momma is getting rather Horse Shy

Considering Joy Worth Looking For