Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Lesson In The Lawn

It has been my desire to write a post for several days
However I have been experiencing a stressful situation
That has caused me to feel physically ill in recent days
So I have not had the energy to sit at my computer

Yet tonight (after my sister made me take a walk with her)
I decided to get up out of my 'easy' chair
And do a little catching up 

After I lost Mark I went into a rather deep depression
I functioned only enough to 'survive'
But did not do anything of substance for many months

The remnants of that season
Began to show vividly around The Place this past summer


The above photo was taken during the late summer
Early fall and is of my backyard lawn
What lawn you say?
Yes, I ignored it for all those months
No water, no trimming, no nurturing, no anything
Death had not only overtaken my heart
But my lawn as well

As I began to breathe and begin to feel again
I decided to plant a winter lawn
We never had winter lawn before
Mark rather disliked the extra work it required
But I wanted needed something green
Something Alive Again
So I mowed, thatched, seeded and fertilized this barren area


Soon, sprouts and sprigs began to pop up all over
Signs of life
Signs of regeneration
Signs of newness
Certainly not much at first
Patchy and thin
Yet, springing up non the less

Eventually more and more patchy areas began coming up
The lawn was becoming thicker and filled in
Each day I would wonder outside just to see the progress
Slow at first but soon it was truly beginning to look like lawn


I look this photo a couple of weeks ago
There are still patchy barren spots
But mostly it has become a beautiful
Green lawn that I definitely enjoy looking at
And my granddaughters have even been enjoying playing outside
The weather has been wonderful
And it is a precious gift of life to watch them play and run on the lawn

What have I learned?
I am just like the lawn
In those months post my husband's passing
All aspects of life within me had died
I was lifeless, depressed, dry, and dead for all intents and purposes

Then one day
God began plowing, planting and tending
I began to feel again
To have hope, peace and even joy
I am still rough around the edges
I continue to have many dry and barren patches
God has much work ahead of Him
There is much tending to still be done in this area of land
But from a distance I'm lookin' fairly well

Thank you for journeying with me friends
I'm considering YOU with Joy,
Cindy


5 comments:

Mining for Diamonds said...

Hello! I've not visited your blog in some time. I love the new look, it is beautiful!

This post is absolutely amazing. Thank you for sharing. What a lovely way of looking at God's work in your life. He has blessed you with a tangible visual example of the work of beauty He is crafting in you. I especially love the visual of the girls playing in the grass...you offer so much hope that the Word of God is true...through weeping may endure for a night, JOY cometh in the morning.

God bless!

Leah Gillen said...

Simply beautiful!

NanaNor's said...

Hi there, Powerful post; so glad the Lord has gently begun to restore you. I know nothing will ever be the same again but praying He has another wonderful plan for you.
Hugs, Noreen

Ferree Bowman Hardy said...

The lawn is a wonderful sign of the new hope God is tending to in you. Love the pictures and your words. *

ter@waaoms said...

I know just how you feel. I have lost a husband (and a child). I lived enough to "survive". Some days are still very hard. Some days I do "okay". I'm very sorry for your loss. I'm glad you found something hopeful in the lawn.