Tuesday, November 18, 2008


It is hard to believe that this is my final post in the on-line book study of Behind Those Eyes.

Lisa Whittle: I cannot begin this post with anything else except a huge thank you for listening to God and being obedient in the writing of this book. Your willingness to open your heart and share what is behind your eyes has caused me to dig deeper into my own soul and allow carefully built walls to be broken down in order for God to reveal what pain was hidden behind my own eyes. As I have stated before, God used this book as another tool in the healing of my wounded soul and I am a changed vessel. There are no words to say thank you enough but God will richly reward you with more jewels in your heavenly crown.

Lelia at WRITEFROMTHEHEART: Thank you so much for your willingness to host this book study. I would not be where I am today had I not found your blog and taken the challenge you set forth. You have shared your heart, your struggles and your joys so openly and I am grateful for you.

Fellow bloggy friends: Thank you for your encouraging words, comments and posts. I have enjoyed reading your stories and getting to know each of you. I know that some of us will remain friends for many years to come. It has been my pleasure to be a part of this study with each of you.

When I first began reading Behind Those Eyes I never expected to have my life change. I began this study during my 50 days leading up to my 50th birthday when I was looking to do things I had never done before. I saw this study and thought: Oh, I've never done an online study, that looks like fun, so I joined in. I was not prepared for the challenges I would face.

I've allowed God to do a lot of work in my heart over the past couple of years as I've struggled with the pain of being hurt. I believed I was healed because I had forgiven and moved on in my life. Little did I know what I was about to face as I began to read Lisa's words.

From the truth hurting to the truth healing my heart has been laid bare and restoration has taken place. Yes, the truth of what was behind my eyes did hurt I just thought nobody else could see so deep within my soul. I realize now that no matter how we try to hide our pain, it will always be there, hidden in the recesses of our soul just waiting to be revealed.

I believe you have seen a progression of God painstakingly removing the wall around my heart brick by brick. You have seen me ask hard questions, go through depression, and take a chance at opening up to share my soul. I wish that at this moment, you could hear my voice, see my face and look into my eyes to hear what they are saying now. The truth has healed and they say I am free.

I am free to love and accept God's love for me. That is the one thing I could never do. I accepted the love of Jesus but not God. Through this study I have been able to acknowledge that painful truth. I wanted so desperately to accept God's love, I was just too afraid. Living in denial of that truth has caused me to miss out on so many wonderful adventures with Him but today I can honestly say that He is my greatest adventure.

Lisa writes: "Know this, my sisters and friends: Jesus is the only One who can truly heal our souls, from the inside out. The healing balm He provides is on a different level altogether from any other soothing balm. The results of His balm in our lives are not temporary and don't wipe off, wear off, or come off. It's not a quick fix. The balm of our heavenly Father is the gift of peace and joy and spiritual growth and unconditional love that is ours for the taking. And it is the gift that allows us to know the sometimes-ugly truth about ourselves, and yet be set free by it." How true these words are. I have been set free from my own self-built prison. I can no longer hide behind perfectionism, confidence, happiness or spiritualism because today I have the freedom to live openly with Joy, Peace and Love.

The process may not be totally complete. I still have not been able to cry but I am confident in knowing that damn will be torn down soon and I hope you will return to hear how God does it.

I have the privilege of going to the Women of Faith conference this weekend. The timing could not be better. I am actually going by myself, which I believe is God's plan. I am expecting closure to this portion of my healing to take place.

I'm not quite sure how to end this post because I feel for many of us it will be good-bye. That makes me sad yet happy that I have had the pleasure of meeting so many wonderful women and sisters in the Lord. You have been privy to a heart being transformed and that makes me happy. I feel a bond with each of you as I have shared such a deep portion of my life and healing with you. I will continue to check in on you to see what wonderful things God is doing in your lives. You are forever a part of my life.

"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." John 8:36

As I sit here this morning typing this post the Lord has spoken four short yet meaningful words to my heart that I will leave you with.

Well done, my daughter!

Considering It All Joy, Cindy


  1. I too have enjoyed reading your journey...for I LOVE to see God working...He is so amazing! I am praying Cindy that your time at Women of Faith this weekend knocks your socks off...knowing God it will happen. Hold His hand and let Him lead you every step of the way!!!

  2. Cindy,

    The "change" in your writing since the beginning of this study is nothing more than miraculous!!

    God is working and he is working so hard to get your attention and show you his neverending love! It is so exciting!!

    Have a wonderful time at the Women of Faith Conference!! I went in September and I would advise you to bring some tissues because that dam may just break this weekend!!

    keep writing your story friend,

  3. Great words! I too have enjoyed this journey, it was much more than I expected, but God is good. I pray your weekend is wonderful - God will speak, so be prepared to listen. I pray our paths will cross again. Blessings, Jill

  4. Beautiful, Cindy. I've enjoyed this study very much, including the fellowship with such lovely ladies as yourself.

    I see you are doing the next study with us so the journey is not over for our fellowship.

  5. I'm going to have to read this book! I am so thankful you took the chance and did the on-line study. I can almost see the difference it has made. I'm so proud of you and thank you for opening up your heart with all of us. Reading your blog is a blessing!

    Keep on keeping on for the glory of God!

    God is so good!

  6. This is our last week of the study at church too and WOW has God spoken to me in so many ways! I love that this was your 50 to 50 road. How awesome is our God! AND you got to go to Women of Faith!! How awesome!!

  7. I pray that you will continue to walk in healing and in God's freedom. Thank you for sharing your heart and being so courageous in doing so.


  8. Cindy,

    I am thrilled to have been on this
    journey with you. Like you, I have
    also experienced healing.

    Keep in touch


  9. Cindy...
    what can I say? This has been an incredible journey. Thank you for sharing it with us. Thank you for sharing so much of yourself with us. I am so grateful for your transparency... it's given me courage to be transparent as well...
    May God bless you and continue His healing work in your life!

  10. I would totally agree with the words you heard from our Papa God...
    You have done well!

    I believe you are about to embark on a journey where you will discover treasures hidden in secret places...

    I remember when I gave my emotions to Papa and asked Him to unlock them. I never thought I'd be able to let them out.... but He knew...
    He will come for those emotions. Don't fret the waiting period, He will bring the release at just the right moment.

    Thanks for your sweet words on my blog. I am thankful that we can walk alongside each other.

    Can't wait to hear about your conference this weekend.


  11. Cindy,

    What can I say? You have inspired and comforted, warmed my heart and challenged me...You have blessed me, my friend. I am so glad that our paths crossed during this study. Let's stay in touch!

    Sending hugs,

  12. To be on this journey with you has meant so much to me dear friend. I loved everything you shared with us and how honest you were in each post. You could feel your pain when you wrote about something painful and rejoice with you when you wrote of something that needed praisin'. God is so good. I'll never understand His ways..all I know is they are much better than when I try to do life my way.
    Blessed to have the opportunity of getting to know you better. So glad you perservered through the tough chapters!

  13. Will be praying for you at WOF this weekend...please share with us when you can.

  14. Thank you so much for sharing. It isn't easy to be so brutally honest and vulnerable. The Lord has placed heavenly and supportive relationships around you, even if you've never met face to face. You ARE free and we've been blessed.

  15. WOW! You amaze me. Seeing God through you and radiate out of you. Amazed. Go, celebreate. Have a joyful time and see closure come. You have an awesome future ahead. Yes, you are free -- free indeed! woo hoo

  16. Cindy,
    I have seen the spirit of God work in your life as we have journeyed together through this study. It is awesome and I will continue to pray for you, read your blog posts, and keep in touch. I look forward to our continued fellowship together.
    I too, found unexpected healing from this study. It feels good to know that I can and should be real, that I am loved, forgiven, and His daughter. What a blessing to have found so many sisters!
    I will pray for your time at Women of Faith. I am eager to read about what God does while you are there.

  17. What an amazing journey we have been on. i have enjoyed getting to know you,the woman"behind those eyes."

    God uses many different ways to bring healing,through His Word, books and friends...Praise God!

    You have encouraged me with your words and willingness to share your what God has done and is going to do in your life.

    We serve a Great God,

  18. My friend, Cindy...
    Wow. This was a most moving and beautiful post...one of the most intimate and real posts I have read. It touched my heart, as you have. Thank you for opening up your heart to this study and to me, through email. I see such a strength in your newfound vulnerability, Cindy. You are a beautiful woman whose future has Jesus written all over it. I just believe that He has great plans for your life...and those plans include an even richer journey than you have thus far traveled! I am praying that for you!

    I love you, friend, and I am blessed by your truth.

    Lisa :)

  19. Cindy...You have inspired me and blessed me. You have been so real and I'm glad you found me and we celebrate the year of the BIG 5-0!! I have 8 days to go. I am so sad that I did not get to finish this study but look forward to completing it soon. Continue to consider it all joy! Happy Thanksgiving! Connie


Hi Friend, I read and cherish every single comment you leave! You bring Joy to my heart! Blessings, Cindy