Friday, September 26, 2008

Reflective!

What happened? Is this what was planned? Where did the time go? Is there any more to life? These and others are the questions I have found myself thinking and asking in the days leading up to my 50th birthday. It's not the way I intended to spend the time before the BIG day.

I intended to take a trip to the Grand Canyon: But busy schedules have put it on the back burner.

I intended to learn to play golf (I have lived in AZ for 14 years): But my fear of being made fun of has stopped me from trying.

I intended to loose more weight and be my healthiest by 50: But I have responded to the call from pizza and ice cream too many times.

I intended to write a book: But I never seem to be able to sit long enough to put words to paper.

I intended to have my naval pierced: Don't even ask!

I intended to ... well, you get the point!

Instead I have been spending time in reflective moments.

I reflect on life as I spend countless hours viewing mindless television.

I reflect on life as I spend countless hours reading other peoples blogs about how wonderful their lives are.

I reflect on life as I spend time view pictures of vacations other people have taken knowing I have not had a real vacation in more than 19 years. I REALLY need a vacation!!!

I reflect on a 27 year marriage with joy and sadness as I watch my husbands' illness eat away at his body.

I reflect on the joys and trials of raising a very special child and wonder if he will ever live independently and what will happen when I have gone to meet Jesus face to face.

I reflect on the errors I have made and how they have affected the BIG picture of my life.

I reflect and wonder about change and seasons and despair and hope.

I reflect on a life of nearly 50 years and wonder if this is all there is. Can God still use this vessel for His Glory? Or, is it too late and I've wasted my life?

I reflect and wonder if my creator is pleased with this life or disappointed that I too am a procrastinator and have allowed fear to stop me from the intendeds in my life.

And then I reflect on God's Word:

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?" Isaiah 43: 18-19

A new thing? Is God doing a new thing in me? Yes!

My husband and son and I have become members of a new and wonderful church this year.

I have accepted the Director of Women's Ministries position at our church this past month.

I have been accepted to do a book review in October - Watch for details! I will be reviewing a new book, Churched by Matthew Turner, and offering a copy on my blog between October 13-17.

I have been invited to be a guest writer on Slurping Life on November 21.

This blog has brought so many wonderful new friends into my life and I am grateful for each one of you who have stopped by and read a post. I especially love reading your comments and visiting your blogs in an attempt to get to know you.

I don't have any idea of what the future holds for my life. What I do know is that I Serve and Love a mighty and powerful God who never changes but is always bringing change in me.

If you actually stuck with this lengthy post: please leave a comment so I can get to know you. My desire to blog is not just about writing stuff but about meeting people from all over the world and hearing your stories of facing life while considering it all joy.

I am so blessed!

Considering It All Joy!
Cindy

11 comments:

  1. Cindy, It was easy to make it all the way through....

    I too found myself very reflective as I celebrated 50 years of life. It was at this point that I began to consider what really mattered. I knew I had already lived the bulk of my life. I would probably not live as many years as I had just finished...I didn't want to waste any more. It really surprised me as to how reflective I was. I didn't expect it.

    I let the color was out of my hair as I told you and began to "own my crown of splendor." I want to live to the fullest while I am here. I don't want to play any more games, especially when it comes to walking with God. I want to live deeply...with no regrets and no turning back...

    Forget the former years is one of my very favorite verses. Yes, He is doing a new thing.

    50, after all is the year of jubilee... I turned 50 and celebrated 25 years of marriage all in the same year... And you know what, I see a new thing rising up in me after this year....

    Reflect on, dear friend. I am listening.

    Hugs,
    Julie
    PS. I can't believe we were born a day apart and a year apart. How cool is that?

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  2. Very well said Cindy, I agree we should stop reflecting too much on the past but dwell on the present and be thankful for the experiences and having able to be still here in the present. Great post.

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  3. As I reflect on you...
    I admire you so much and I don't even know you. If I knew you better I would go with you to go get your naval pierced (sorry to go there). I'd go golfing with you and tell you to not worry about how you play. We aren't professional golfers. We just want to have a little fun. I'd tell you that reading blogs is a lot better than sitting in front of the t.v.

    I will tell you that God will take care of your family. Keep trusting Him with your life. YOU are doing great things for God's Kingdom! I pray you can take that trip one day in the near future. I hope it's to the Grand Canyon!

    As I reflect on you... I see a very special woman! I Consider It All Joy... to have stopped by your blog today!
    Love,
    Angie xoxo

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  4. Hi Cindy,
    Happy Birthday! Your post has been an inspiration to me. This season has found me at a place ripe for change, and I'm excited about what God has in store...

    I think I'm finally learning to stop trying to please others and just please the Lord. When I focus there, all else falls into place, and I feel so much more peace.

    I'm taking control of my health in a way I never have before. Hubby and I joined Weight Watchers and we're exercising more, etc.

    Most importantly, I'm allowing God to consistently have His proper place in my life. I can't believe all He has shown and taught me through meeting others via their blogs. It has been a great source of friendship, encouragement, spiritual mentoring, accountability and definitely inspiration. ; )

    Thank you for being a part of that. You encouraged me earlier this week with your kindness and prayers. My heart was also warmed to read that you and your family are organ donors, and that your own husband and son have been able to take part in that amazing blessing.

    So good to meet you. I'll be back.

    Blessings sweet new friend,
    Tracy

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  5. What a touching post! We serve a big God! Thanks for stopping by my blog...I'll be coming back to yours for sure. I'm excited to hear about all the new things God is doing in your life.

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  6. Oh Cindy, this was inspiring! To know that we all have struggles and if onlys, and we all are redeemed by God's wonderful and gentle love.
    When I read this I just wanted to hug you and sit down and chat with you face to face. I think I could learn SO much from you!
    ((HUGS))

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  7. Congratulations on your new church and new position! How exciting. And Happy Early BDay! I'm so glad you will be participating in "My One Month"...I can't wait to read your post.

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  8. Cindy...
    Yes, it was easy to make it all the way through your post!
    Like Angie... I would go w/ you to get that piercing! I would play golf with you...

    Thank you for sharing your heart. And I would have to bet that God doesn not feel you have wasted your life! But I am sure the best is yet to come!

    God Bless You!!!

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  9. What a beautiful beautiful post Cindy! I loved this.

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  10. I so appreciate your genuine heart. Life isn't always what we thought it would be. It throws curves we aren't certain we can live through, but somehow God turns them into a good. Like this blog post is a ministry to so many. I will be fifty in a year and a half (sound like I'm 5) but it makes you think. One of my favorite verses is "He will restore the years the locust has eaten." Cling close to Him. Love, Annette

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  11. Cindy,
    Congratulations on all of the great things God is doing in your life!
    You said that you intended to write a book and haven't... did you know that there is a website that will turn your blog into a book for you? I don't know the name of it, but I can check around and let you know!
    You are a great writer and you have a wonderful perspective!
    Have a fantastic weekend!
    Angie

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Hi Friend, I read and cherish every single comment you leave! You bring Joy to my heart! Blessings, Cindy