"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." Matthew 7:7-8
Friends,
Honestly, I am not good at the above way of life.
I am independent, self sufficient, and strong!
Proud of my abilities to 'DO' what needs to be done.
It is the life I have lived!
It is the only way I know!
I am an Awesome Nurturer but do not for the life of me know How to Be nurtured!
Yet, I am Desperate for just that!
My way of life worked throughout the 30 years of my marriage
It just did!!
It just doesn't now!
During the next 90 days I will face
My first birthday alone in 30 years
My first Thanksgiving without my beloved
The one year anniversary of his passing
Christmas
And his Birthday
I do NOT know how I am going to get through this 90 day season
At first I wanted to come on here
~My Blog~
And Beg you to help me
But it is so wrong
I know I have only gotten through the past 9 months
Because of God's love for me
However, facing the upcoming events seems unimaginable
I am really not as strong as my exterior portrays
If you could only see me now
I am quite sure this is exactly where God wants me
Alone, desperate, pleading, broken
Yet, it is so against my nature
Yet, it is so against my nature
Desperately Broken In Arizona,
Cindy
Cindy,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry about your loss. I can't imagine your pain and lonliness right now. I do pray God will give you comfort and companionship that will help you through the coming months.
God bless you!
Marilyn...in Mississippi
Cindy,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry....I can not even imagine what you are feeling. I will pray though....I will pray for peace, for comfort and for healing. I will also pray for the joy of the Lord so that you may be strengthened.
Cindy,
ReplyDeleteI stumbled in here searching for the verse you posted, but reading your words struck me. You and I are very much alike. Like you I am happy to give, but uncomfortable receiving. My hope is that over the years you have allowed yourself the privilege of receiving. There is no doubt that you are deserving of the gifts God wishes to bless you with. May you be surrounded with peace and joy in this upcoming holiday season.